PLEASE start with Part 1!
"What...?!" I pulled away from him and let out an embarrassed laugh.
"Oh, no kiss?"
"Uh... No?!" What the hell?
"See? Now I know that you don't feel comfortable kissing me."
"What? You couldn't have just asked me?"
"Well, now I know."
What was he talking about? "So that was a test?"
"Essentially. If you had kissed me, it would have told me that you were into me. But since you didn't, it's still up in the air."
Did he just make a game out of making me uncomfortable? ... great. I went to the bathroom and checked my phone: pretty much out of batteries. I had a message from The Ex, wishing me a happy 40 month anniversary, and wished I was on a date with him instead of this ridiculous, strange person. When I returned to the table, he make a very misguided joke about putting a roofie in my drink. He then immediately laughed it off and took a sip himself as proof of his innocence. Superb...
I quickly told him that I hadn't realized how late it was and needed to get home. "Stay a little longer!" He whined.
"No, I seriously have to go."
He paid for the drinks and walked me back to the apartment. On the way, he childishly demanded a romantic kiss in the falling snow. "No, I don't think so." He leaned in anyway, and I tried to back away without slipping on the slushy sidewalk.
"No! Didn't I say no?!"
"Oh, come on! It's just a kiss!" He continued to lean in, sounding pathetic as usual, but also a little frightening: this was the first time I had pulled away that he had actually continued trying to kiss me. I spun around trying to avoid him, and he followed.
"SERIOUSLY! Stop it." I pushed him away. "Please, just take me back to your place so I can get my things."
He laughed good-naturedly at me and took me back to his place. When we arrived at the apartment, he told me that I should take my shoes off so I wouldn't track water onto the floors. "I'm just going to be putting them right back on," I protested. He hadn't asked me to take my shoes off when I came in the first time.
"Fine, keep them off. You'll just be taking them off anyway," He said, the chime in his voice sounding like a wink.
We went up to his room and I gathered my things. "Nooo! Stay a little bit!"
I pulled out my train schedule to "consult," and then informed him that I really seriously had to go right away so I wouldn't miss my train. He was adamant, and I was becoming afraid that he would switch his act from pouty to angry. I kissed him once, hoping he would shut the hell up and stop whining about me leaving. Since I really wanted him to let me leave as soon as possible and I felt more comfortable being with him in public, I asked him to walk me to the subway. "Of courseI will; I'm a gentleman after all."
As we approached the subway, he asked me when we would see each other again. "Uh, I don't know?" (How about never?)
Not wanting to deal with an angry person who wouldn't take no for an answer, I simply reminded him that he had my phone number from my earlier calls. He asked me to give him a kiss goodbye, and I gave him one on the cheek, then skipped through the turnstile to freedom.
Tuesday, February 27
PLEASE start with Part 1!