Friday, April 6

I was tricked into ordering that martini, I tell you

This week, I went out to din-din with a couple friends of mine. One of them, Snarkfest, was visiting from out of town, so it was a special occasion. I had just come from my internship, and Biggest Wimp Ever had as well. We met at the restaurant and studied our menus. I knew there would be no drinking that night, because Snarkfest never drinks and Biggest Wimp Ever is underage and afraid to try her luck ordering drinks. Having recently decided to stop spending money on horribly overpriced alcohol I can't afford, I was fine with this.

When the waitress came, she asked if we wanted cocktails. When we told her no, she said "Oh, then I guess I won't give you the spiel."

Spiel? What could this be? Oooh, what if it was reasonably priced drinks! Or... free drinks! I had to find out. "No, go ahead," I told her with a smile.

She informed us that they were out of half of their drinks and pointed to the ones that were safe to order. I was disappointed. My imaginary free drink mocked me.

"Ooooh, you should get a margarita so I can have some!" Biggest Wimp Ever squealed. Then her face fell. "Oh, I forgot you don't like margaritas."

"Hmm, well..." I felt I should do something. "What if I got the pomegranate martini and you had some of it?" Biggest Wimp Ever nodded enthusiastically.

After I ordered, I realized my mistake. There was no way Biggest Wimp Ever, who is also Biggest Cheapskate Ever, would pay for half of the drink. I had planned to actually share the drink with her, as well as the cost. That way, I wouldn't be the only one drinking at the table. But if she wasn't going to pay, why should I give her more than a sip of my $12 martini?

My two choices:
1. I'm a greedy alcoholic who doesn't mind paying for the drink because I'm a little tipsy, or
2. I'm a generous alcoholic who looks good but hates Biggest Wimp Ever for weeks because she stole my expensive alcohol

What would you do?


Ripsy said...

That's why I don't hang out with you guys. I would stab her.

Strange Bird said...

I take the role of the responsible money counter and simply tell her how much she owes, a number that includes half of the drink. Of course, my friends aren't freeloaders and would offer to pay anyway.

Sipwine said...

Pull out 6 bucks, lay it on the table, and say, here is my half when she gets back, then excuse yourself and go to the bathroom.

Stay as long as you like.

Come back only when you are sure the waitress has delivered the drink.... can you tell i've done this before?

Princess Extraordinaire said...

Let her know - it isn't cool to be cheap and a whino - you shouldn't have to pay for her *happy* hour...on that note - have a drink for me

WiscoBlonde said...

Bird and Sipwine - brilliant ideas! But I agree, you need to find new friends.

Dropout! said...

Ok two things. 1, when I started reading this, I was like, when did you change my nickname, and 2, I wasn't visiting, I moved here, and who's Biggest wimp ever, and "din-din"? and we did drink that night, and then I realized that you were talking about a different night with different people.

Also, I hate these computers.

Airam said...

I would not share a 12 dollar martini. Period. Unless they were forking over some money for it.

The Accidental Bitch said...

ripsy - I'm surprised that half the people who know you haven't been stabbed already. Methinks you're all talk.

strange bird - Yeah that role would just make me uncomfortable. And then she would think I was being a bitch.

sipwine - lol I don't think I could ever do that.

princess extraordinaire - See, I prefer not to tell people that they're being rude. Because then I feel rude. It's silly.

wiscoblonde - Based on this one thing? But yeah, Biggest Wimp Ever isn't my top choice.

dropout - You're starting to remind me of The Heterophobe (thinking everything is about him... although after last night, he may feel completely justified)

airam - Yeah that's why when I realized she probably wouldn't pay, I just decided to give her a sip and hoarded the rest. If it was $2, I would have been much more generous of course!

monicker said...

Chalk it up to a lesson learned. If Wimp isn't going to pony up, don't do her any more favors till she's legally allowed to buy you a drink in return.

lessake said...

I come from poor poor Eastern Europe country (bit of sarcasm here and a joke on myself - so you'd know - but let's move on) and with that money I could probably get quite good dinner here. So ... you did the right thing hoarding the most cause you were practically drinking gold. Gold, I tell ya, gold!

+ you gotta start training your friends that sharing means sharing all the ways

Miss Devylish said...

Yeah, my friends would share it all ways and be kind enough to split the tab w/ me on it. Or they'd just take a sip, which I'd offer for free, and they'd be cool about dealing w/ not having more. And if you don't want to be rude, you probably handled it just fine by hoarding. I love hoarding. :)

The Ambiguous Blob said...

I'd order 5 drinks, pay for everyone's meal, and the cab ride home. because I'm a generous alchy. It's sad- truly sad- for my bank book.